Bob & Brian Timeshare Stories

Bob & Brian Stories
clipart.com,102.9 THE HOG

CONGRATULATIONS TO Glenda Egstad of Germantown

We accepted a timeshare invitation for a well-known property in the Wisconsin Dells for a free two-night stay. Our three daughters were old enough to use the water park while we attended the meeting. After one hour at the high-pressure end of the tour meeting, we kept saying no, thank you. We want to leave. Suddenly, a water park employee came running in, asking where Erin’s parents were, who is our oldest daughter. She had slipped on the pool deck and was bleeding profusely from her head. We both got up to leave, but the timeshare rep told us only one had to go and the other could stay to finish. After a few words that can’t be used on the radio, we left for the hospital. Five stitches later, she is now given credit for saving us from the timeshare meeting.

Did you ever sit through a two-hour timeshare presentation just to score free Cirque du Soleil tickets in Vegas? Have you ever pretended to be broke, allergic to the beach, or violently afraid of vacationing—just to get out of a timeshare deal? Have you ever agreed to a timeshare tour just for the free boat rental… only to end up trapped on a golf cart for 90 minutes of “exclusive property” viewing?

If you said “yes” to any of those questions, then the Boys want to hear about it during Bob & Brian’s Timeshare Stories! Just send us your story, and you’ll qualify for the grand prize worth $1,485!

Steinhafels

$500 Gift Card from Steinhafels

Sharbuno Jewelers

Ladies Sterling Silver Created Ruby and Diamond Pendant courtesy of Sharbuno Jewelers

$500 Menards Gift Card Courtesy of C&N Drywall and Painting

BRIAN’S 10 (PLUS 1) COMMANDMENTS OF STORY-WRITING

1. The phrase “Needless to say” has been outlawed by this program long ago. For some reason, if left unchecked, its use becomes nearly universal. If every letter we read on the air set up the punchline with the phrase, “Needless to say”, that would become a huge irritant and you would barf. Needless to say, that would be no good.

2. Don’t tell me that you’re going to tell me a great story. First of all, there’s a word limit and you’re wasting words. I never read that part on the air anyway. Second, you might be a great storyteller at parties when everyone is drunk, but this is the written word and that’s not the same thing, plus you should be sober. And third, you may be deluded. Did you ever watch the first horrible contestants on a season of American Idol? They think they’re great too. Just get on with it.

3. Proofread your story, or better yet, have someone else do it. If they read your work, then look at you quizzically and say, “Huh?”, you will need to clean up your prose. Your brain knows what it wants to write, so it fills in blanks and misses mistakes when reading its own writing. The value of proofreading, for these contests, cannot be overstated.

4. Have patience. Your brain works faster than your fingers can type. Work on your story. If you just try to get every memory in your head funneled through a keyboard and into an e-mail message and then you hit “Send”, chances are you have sent me a garbled pile of phrases that only make sense to you.

5. OK, knock off the “Priceless” format letters. Too many writers use it now. “One horse blanket, fifty dollars; a trip to the dentist, five hundred dollars; getting kicked in the head, Priceless!” Just don’t do it. If every letter ended the same way, you would barf.

6. Use the right words. “Here” and “hear”, “accept” and “except” and “addition” and “edition” are three pairs of words that are not interchangeable. “Than” and “then” are two words that get mixed up and they shouldn’t. You should know better than to use them incorrectly. If you do, then I’ll become madder than a wet hen and then I won’t read your story. Then, you will be sad, but being sad is better than having piles.

7. If you do have to chop sentences to get under the word limit. If every letter I read sounds like it was written by Tarzan, you barf. Needless to say, that is no good.

8. Correct punctuation, capitalization, spelling, and sentence structure all make your story easier to read. If you are trying to win a contest, why would you not make your letter easy to read? If you don’t care enough about your entry to spend some time on it, why should I?

9. You can’t seriously expect us to read a bunch of profanities on the air, can you? Leave them out of your story. (The previous two sentences were relieved of five profanities.)

10. The closer you stick to these suggestions, the better your chances of having your letter read on the air. Following them won’t make you a great writer, but they will keep you from doing things that irritate the judge, and that’s me. It isn’t reasonable to expect every letter to be perfect, and just about every e-mail gets edited, but it isn’t fair to edit one letter far more than another. At some point, your work becomes my work, and that’s not right. If there weren’t prizes involved it wouldn’t matter, but there are, so it does.

and one more thing…

11. Keep written dialogue to an absolute minimum. A conversation that seems clear in the writer’s memory often shows up on paper looking like: ‘… So He sez Holy SH*t aandd I go down tthe stairz and I go ‘Holy Sh*t’ an’d he sayys Look ou!t but I don’t here” %5 him becaz+ my ma was>?/ yeling what^> are you too doing up their.??/””..+=)8&^<%>4#@! Needless to say we all died. Priceless.”

Bob and Brian’s Timeshare Stories Contest Rules

Enter your Timeshare Story at 1029thehog.com between 12:01am Monday, 8/18/25 and 11:59pm Thursday, 8/28/25. No purchase necessary. One entry per person.  Multiple entries by an individual will disqualify all entries by that individual. The prizes are a $500 Steinhafels gift card, a Ladies Sterling Silver Created Ruby and Diamond Pendant, courtesy of Sharbuno Jewelers, a $485 value, and a $500 Menards gift card, courtesy of C7N Drywall & Painting.  The grand prize package has a $1485 total retail value.  WHQG reserves the right to add additional prize(s) to this package.  Winner will be randomly selected from all stories read on the air by 102.9 THE HOG staff from all eligible entries at, or around 10:15a Friday, 8/29/25.  Entrants and winner will be chosen at the sole discretion of WHQG. Winner will also be contacted by email. WHQG contests are open to all eligible Wisconsin residents 18 or older who have not won anything on WHQG in the past 30 days or any prize valued at $600 or more in the past 6 months. Only one winner per household is permitted within 30 days after a household has a winner. If it is determined that a listener is ineligible, a prize will not be awarded, and that another name may be randomly chosen. Any attempt by any participant to obtain more than the stated number of entries allowed by using same, multiple or different email addresses, identities or any other methods void that participant’s entries and that participant may be disqualified. All prizes are non-transferrable or redeemable for cash.  All winners of all contests are responsible for all federal, state, and/or local taxes on prizes awarded. We will make reasonable efforts to award Prizes within 30 days after winning. The winner will be notified by phone when the qualifying prize is ready for pick up at the station.

Employees of WHQG, Lakefront Communications LLC, and its ultimate parent company, Saga Communications, Inc., their advertising agencies, affiliates, contest sponsors, employees and immediate families of each, and employees of all media of mass communication within a one hundred mile radius of WHQG’s main studio are not eligible to win any contest. 

Immediate family includes the spouse, great-grandparents, grandparents, parents, brothers, sisters, children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren of the employee and his/her spouse. This also includes individuals for whom the employee is current legal guardian.

General: All decisions of WHQG are final and shall be binding in all respects. Entry into this contest constitutes permission to use the name or likeness of each prize winner for advertising, trade, and publicity purposes without prior approval and without prior approval and without additional compensation. Additionally, listeners who opt-in acknowledge and give WHQG permission to share their information with sponsors.

This contest is void where prohibited by law. All local, state and federal regulations apply. All giveaways and contests are void where prohibited by law. As a licensee of the FCC and a trustee of the public airwaves, WHQG reserves the right to interrupt and/or discontinue this contest (and not award the offered prizes) at the discretion of WHQG management if world events, the national mood, or public safety so warrant. WHQG reserves the right to disqualify any winner if the contest rules have been violated in any way. WHQG reserves the right to amend these rules to any contest at any time.

Full contest rules are available at WHQG or Milwaukee Media Group offices, located at 5407 West McKinley Ave. Milwaukee, WI 53208 between the hours of 9:00am and 5:00pm or by visiting www.1029thehog.com.

All WHQG General Contest Rules apply and are final.

WHQG General Contest Rules

These are the rules governing all contests aired on 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG radio and on the 1029thehog.com website or 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG mobile app, unless otherwise specified. In the following rules, “102.9 THE HOG/WHQG” means Lakefront Communications, LLC, dba Milwaukee Radio Group and its parent corporation, Saga Communications, Inc., which owns 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG radio:

  1. No purchase is necessary to enter any 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG contest.
  2. To be eligible to win any prize on 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG you must not have won anything on 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG in the past 30 days or any prize valued at $600 or more in the past 6 months. Only one winner per household is permitted within 30 days after a household has a winner. Any prize awarded to an ineligible listener will be deemed null and void, and an alternate eligible winner may be named.
  3. Anytime you call the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG studios you assume that your call will be broadcast or recorded and you grant us permission to broadcast the call or record it for later broadcast.
  4. As a winner of a 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG contest your voice, name and/or picture may be used for promotional, broadcast, or internet purposes without any compensation to you.
  5. Prizes awarded are not redeemable for cash. No prize is transferable. No substitution for a prize will be made at the request of winner. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right to substitute a prize of similar value.
  6. All winners of all contests are responsible for all taxes on prize awarded. All winners of a prize valued at $600 or more will be required to complete the appropriate tax forms at the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG studios prior to claiming prize. All winners will be sent a 1099 MISC federal tax form if in one calendar year the prize value of all prizes won exceeds $600.
  7. In the event the winner is subject to or the subject of any order or legal process issued by any governmental agency having jurisdiction over the affairs of the winner (i.e. garnishment, child support order, judgment, lien, and the like), 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG’s delivery of the prize to the official representative of the governmental entity claiming a right to the prize shall be thus deemed as (102.9 THE HOG/WHQG) awarding the prize to the winner. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG shall be entitled to rely in good faith, upon any documents presented by the representative seeking to collect the prize in lieu of the winner. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG shall not be liable for any claim by any winner for damages incidental thereto.
  8. All 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG contests are open to all eligible residents 18 or over (unless otherwise specified) living within 75 miles of station transmitter(s). Contestants must possess a valid form of identification bearing the picture of the contestant acceptable to 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG that will be presented to 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG and accepted before the prize is awarded. Employees of 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG, it's advertising agencies, affiliates, contest sponsors, employees and immediate families of each, and employees of all media of mass communication within a one hundred mile radius of the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG main studio are not eligible to win any contest. Immediate family includes the spouse, great-grandparents, grandparents, parents, brothers, sisters, children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren of the employee and their spouse. This also includes individuals for whom the employee is current legal guardian.
  9. Winners will be expected to claim prize at the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG studios, 5407 West McKinley Avenue, Milwaukee, Wisconsin 53208, between 12:00pm – 5:00pm, Monday through Friday (excluding holidays) within 30 days of being notified that they are winners, unless there is an expiration date on prize, which will be specifically stated.
  10. Where the prize(s) consists of paper tickets (“will-call tickets”) the winner will be directed to go to a specified address and retrieve the will-call tickets, and, by entering the contest, the contestant agrees to pick up will-call tickets and sign and deliver to 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG a waiver form as directed. Where the prize(s) consists of electronic (digital) concert or event tickets (“e-tickets”), the winner will receive an email from 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG with a hyperlink to an electronic waiver form that the winner must sign and return to the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG before the prize will be transferred to the winner. The e-tickets will be transferred to the winner by 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG or, in some cases, by a third party (for example, Ticketmaster, Live Nation, etc.) and the winner must check his or her email account for an email or cellular mobile number for a text message from the ticket provider in order to download the e-tickets. Where e-tickets are a prize, as a condition of entering the contest, redeeming and using e-tickets requires the winner (i) to have a valid email address and an app-enabled mobile device capable of downloading and running a third-party mobile ticketing app (e.g., Ticketmaster, Live Nation, etc.); (ii) to install, or have already installed, such mobile ticketing app on their app-enabled mobile device; and (iii) to log into an existing user account or sign up for a free user account with the third-party operating such mobile ticketing app by completing a form with all required information, including, at a minimum, the winner's first name, last name, valid email address and telephone number. E-tickets awarded as a prize in such contests cannot be redeemed or used by any means other than the designated third-party mobile ticketing app for the e-tickets. Individuals who do not have a valid email address, access to an app-enabled mobile device and/or do not comply with these requirements will not be able to redeem or use e-tickets should they be selected and verified as a winner, will not receive a substitute prize, and should not enter contests where e-tickets are the prize.
  11. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right to disqualify any entrant if any contest rules are violated in any way.
  12. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG assumes no liability for situations, repairs, or incidents arising from any aspect of any prize awarded in any contest. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG, its advertising agencies, affiliates, contest sponsors, employees, and immediate families of each are absolved and shall be held harmless from any action or liability arising from any contest or prize awarded in any contest.
  13. As a licensee of the FCC and a trustee of the public airwaves, 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right to interrupt and/or discontinue any contest or promotion (and not award the offered prize) at the discretion of 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG management if world events, the national mood, or public safety so warrant.
  14. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right to amend the rules to any contest at any time. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG's decision is always final. In the event any one of the general contest rules which govern all 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG contests contradict with any specific contest term, the specific contest term will control.
  15. For any contest requiring phone entry you must use only the following number unless otherwise specified: 414-799-1029. For texting it is 414-799-1029. The person processing inbound calls and/or texts at 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG has the final decision as to who is the winning entrant.
  16. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG shall have no responsibility for contestant’s inability or failure to participate, failure to win or claim any prize based on malfunction or difficulties with telephone, cell phone, texting, email, mobile applications, internet access, or any other circumstances in any contest beyond 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG’s control.
  17. For any contest involving on-line voting: If an entrant receives irregular votes, including but not limited to, votes generated by a robotic, programmed, script, macro, or other automated means, 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right to disqualify the entrant in its sole discretion and/or use another means to determine the winner(s), ex. – random selection or appointing a panel of judges.
  18. For any contests involving tickets to live performances or events, winners will need to follow all health and public safety guidelines and protocols put in place by the concert organizer.
  19. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG is not responsible for any event cancellations or reschedules.
  20. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG is not responsible for:
    • internet crashes or slowdowns caused by network congestion
    • viruses
    • sabotage
    • satellite failures
    • phone line failures
    • electrical outages
    • natural or man-made disasters
    • lost, late, misdirected, postage-due, unintelligible, returned, or undelivered entries or email
    • lost, interrupted, or unavailable satellite, network, server, Internet Service Provider (ISP), website, or other internet connections, providers, or platforms
    • failed telephone, satellite or cable hardware or software or lines, or jumbled, scrambled, delayed, or misdirected transmissions
    • computer hardware or software malfunctions, failures, or difficulties
    • other errors of any kind whether human, mechanical, electronic, or network

    Persons who tamper with or abuse any aspect of this contest or website, or act in violation of the official service, as solely determined by the station, will be disqualified. Neither sponsor nor promotion parties are responsible for any incorrect or inaccurate information whether caused by website users, tampering, hacking, or by any of the programming or equipment associated with or used in this contest, and assume no responsibility for any errors, omissions, deletions, interruptions or delays in operation or transmission or communication line failure, theft or destruction or unauthorized website access.

    102.9 THE HOG/WHQG is not responsible for injury or damage to participant’s or any other person’s computer or property related to or resulting from participating in this contest. Should any portion of contest be, in 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG’s sole opinion, compromised by virus, worms, bugs, unauthorized human intervention (i.e., hackers) or other causes which, in the sole opinion of the station, corrupt or impair administration, security, fairness or proper play of this contest, or contest plays, 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG reserves the right at its sole discretion to suspend, modify or terminate the contest.

  21. 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG has not made nor is in any manner responsible or liable for any warranty, representation, or guarantee, express or implied, in fact or in law, relative to any prize, including but not limited to its quality, mechanical condition or fitness for a particular purpose. Any and all warranties and/or guarantees on prize (if any) are provided only by the manufacturer, and winners agree to look solely to such manufacturers for any such warranty and/or guarantee.
  22. The following are specifically related to E-contests and E-Mail Club promotions on 1029thehog.com:
    1. All appropriate information in required fields must be entered correctly and completely or you will be disqualified.
    2. To win a prize you must reside within the listening area of 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG as defined at the exclusive discretion of 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG management.
    3. Any problems with the internet or email are not 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG’s responsibility.
    4. Contestants who register to participate on our website may be required to produce a printed copy of proof of registration before being allowed to participate in the contest.
    5. Due to the nature of our programs that are heard on-line over the internet, contests may not be heard at all on 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG. Contests heard on the radio station’s internet audio stream may be slightly delayed from the time the contests are heard on the broadcast station, and will be running behind the broadcast signal. Thus, all contests heard on the internet are delayed. This delay can last for as much as 30 seconds or more. This means that when 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG contests are played that require a specific caller to telephone the radio station (such as “Caller number 9 when you hear the sound effect”), listeners to the on-line audio stream may be at a disadvantage in participating over those listeners who hear the contests on-air.
  23. A copy of these rules is available during business hours at the 102.9 THE HOG/WHQG studios 5407 West McKinley Avenue, Milwaukee, Wisconsin 53208
Updated March 6, 2023