This is a commentary about my breasts. Turn away now if you’re faint of heart, or want to take your pants down.

First mammogram a few weeks ago results in one of those phone calls that make you stare at the wall for awhile upon hanging up. “Could you come back and so we can get a few more images? Don’t worry, this is very common”, but of course as she says this I am well on my way. I think, keep your feet on the ground, just keep your feet on the ground.  Over the next two days I do alot of reading about breast cancer; a subject I have refused to think about since September of 2000, when the disease killed my Mom. More accurately, spread everywhere and ate through her chest wall, in giant, scaly, layered crusts that seemed more like some primordial volcanic landscape than an area we used to hug.

Feet on the ground, trying not to panic, but seriously thinking about what would happen to that gorgeous boy of mine if something were really wrong? Most specifically, who would ever be able to tell him how much I loved him? And how he changed my life? And why I considered him an angel? How much I bragged about him? This is all that I kept thinking about. And it occured to me, sadly, the only person that really knew, I mean, saw day to day and really knew  is my ex-husband. And we will never talk again for many reasons. That was an awful punctuation on this potential bad news.

Cajoled again with a chorus of  ‘this is very common’, we take more images and I am basically told we probably won’t even need the ultrasound. Wait 10 minutes.  Tech comes back in and I am told I would need an ultrasound for yet an even closer look. This is the first time my heart fell out of my body. The second time was laying on the table, during, when the tech began measuring an almond shaped black hole, or mass, or….”What is that?” I queried, audibly alarmed. “Probably milk ducts, I’ll know in a minute”.  Indeed, milk ducts in extremely dense breast tissue.  Begin breathing again.

So that’s me: little, but what I got, I got alot. At least now I know I will probably always need additional imaging and it won’t be as disconcerting as this round. As for my son, for years now,  before this weird little peak at mortality, we have told each other we love each other an average of 10 times a day; this is no exaggeration. So we have already been living and loving like each day is our last; of this, I am exceptionally proud.

Once again, I might add! Thanks to the entire staff of 105.9 The Hog, our Janesville affiliate and cool best friends, for once again showing us how to cram alot of fun into a mere two hours! Evansville, WI The Soybean Capital of Wisconsin, if you didn’t know, played host to their Annual Listener Appreciation Party with guest appearances by Bob and Brian and myself. This group is truly what I loved about radio when I started out; everyone works together and has fun together, and each person in the group is funnier than the last. I miss those days before giant egos and falling commission checks.

I managed to escape without riding the bull at The Wild Ride Saloon and only one date request (guess I’m really slowing down in my old age).

Thanks to the Mike Stone Band as well for completely tearing up that stage, as well!!

Join the great crowd that is the Waukesha Noon Lion’s Club on Valentine’s Day at Curly’s Pub just off SS in Pewaukee for the 19th Annual Waukesha Noon Lion’s Club Ice Fishing Jamboree. Cash prizes for fish, many raffles and a silent auction.

What’s the Purpose? All proceeds from this event go back into the community and help support the Wisconsin Lions Camp for Kids!

Well, almost. A couple of home study things and a couple of faux teaching tests to pass, then the glory shall be mine. Very proud of myself and my fellow students for taking a chance and seeing it all through. I was so sore after the intermediate teaching level this past weekend that even laughing really hurt.

Pilates is a wonderful mind-body modality I encourgage all of you to try no matter what your fitness level (the only reason we were so sore is because we had to do exercises over and over for two days straight, to help each other learn to teach). You’ll feel and seem taller, you’ll have a subtle shift in your awareness of your reactions to others (read: more bodily grace seems mysteriously to help with spiritual grace as well!) and you’ll have found a modality that you can modify to fit any body, so that almost everyone can reap the benefits of these wonderful exercises. All you need is a mat. Oh, and me, to begin with! As soon as I find a space to teach I will let you know.

Investigators now believe the fire that devastated the building housing Pizza Man, Grecian Delight etc now started in the Black and White Cafe. No definitive word on how at this point according to published reports this morning.

There is a Party with a Purpose opportunity in the way of a fundraiser for those tenants who lived in the building, this Thursday night, 6 to 930pm at the Twisted Fork (a few blocks east of the fire site on North and Farwell). Come on in, make a donation (anything will help), and probably hear more than one great memory of Pizza Man.

Just when I was finally getting over being hooked on oriental drugs, another landmark in the area takes a hit.

With the building fully engulfed that morning, I emailed a girlfriend and sadly asked if she remembered a double-date we had at Pizza Man some years earlier. She quipped, “I think all my dates included a dinner at Pizza Man”.

Our respective dates that night eventually became her ex-boyfriend and my ex-husband.

Putting the FUN in fundraiser, for little Ruby Tylenda-Emmons, born over the summer with a multitude of medical problems due to lacking a 22nd chromosome. Meet at the Irish Cultural Center, 2133 West Wisconsin Avenue on Saturday January 23rd from 2pm to 6pm.

Plenty of entertainment by The McMenamin Irish dancers, Sue DeBaco and the Wise Fools, Maple Road and more. Your ten dollar donation also gets you McBobb’s Famous corned beef sandwiches, Irish beverages, Irish items for sale as well as raffles and a silent auction. An excellent reason to Party With A Purpose!!

Dude! He is totally shredding and loving every minute of it! His Mom is one Happy Betty!!

Got the board from old Grandad for Christmas, and I have been his human tow-rope ever since, pushing him back up a sledding hill over and over so he gets  max runs on an outing. Eric says I may be spoiling, that he really has to learn to do the work himself. I do believe he is right, at least my back says he is, but for right now it’s so great to see him hooked on yet another fun sport. Next stop Sunburst for an actual lesson, not just me yipping into the wind. I tried snowboarding a thousand years ago, and still remember what to do, and another parent on the hill even asked me if I could teach her son, as well, so I must be doing something right.

But it’s really nothing to do with my directions, I have to say with any kind of sport that requires balance, mine is a phenom. He so naturally corrects himself that it seems pre-programmed. He was this way with a scooter, a bicycle and a dirtbike, and snowboarding is just more of the same for him. Within one day, he was jumping up to turn his board back down the hill to keep himself going. Sure, there have been falls, but many more times when he could have fallen, and corrects his position. Such a thrill!  Off to San Diego to try some surfing, I think….We are such a lucky little family, it’s crazy!!!

Thanks to Robin, who never fails to disappoint with her white teeth and Brewer zubaz!!  I have had several email to tell me this is actually great, so have it, Cooks!!

2 cups celery, diced

1/2 cup red onion, diced

2 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese

2 cups water chestnuts, diced

1 cup fried and diced bacon (bacon bits)

2 cups Miracle Whip

2/3 cup sugar

2 Tbsp cider vinegar

12 cups popped popcorn

Mix together above ingredients but not the popcorn until just before serving.

Victoria’s Pub and Grill, n51-w34911 on Wisconsin Avenue in OKauchee will be the backdrop for a benefit in honor of Jennifer Luick and Gregg Peters…both shot and killed outside a Jefferson tavern a few short weeks ago.

Please come to Victoria’s  Wednesday from 6 to 10pm; free food, raffles and a silent auction. Donations to help Luick’s 11 year old son can also be made at any Associated Banks.